Honoring your “Season” of Life
Having small children, and all the blessings and challenges that come with it, is a radically life changing experience.
Recently my husband and I celebrated our 5th wedding anniversary. Over a wine and dessert picnic, we reflected on how different our lives were now, with a toddler and a newborn, than they were 5 years ago. We discussed how our former, childless selves had no idea how much time and freedom we had. We mused with a tinge of jealousy about all the traveling and exciting experiences our childless friends were having while we stayed at home caring for our kids.
And yet, we both agreed we wouldn’t change a damn thing. This was the life we chose, and it’s a life we love.
I find what helps me not get hung up on things I wish I could be doing (or things I wish were different) is to remind myself to honor this season of life. No, I don’t have as much time or freedom to travel or go out with friends as my childless peers, but instead I have the deep sweetness of cuddling two precious little ones. Yes, it can be a trade off, but life is about making choices and honoring that you cannot choose all experiences at once—there are different times or “seasons” that certain priorities take precedence.
My children will not be small forever. Although parenting young children can be challenging, I don’t want to wish away the sleepless nights or endless diapers because I know in just a few years I will miss their baby days dearly. Instead I try to savor every moment of them being small.
You may find yourself in a similar situation where you currently don’t have enough time in the day to pursue all your passions- maybe you’re in school and studying is taking precedence, or you’re taking care of an elder relative who needs you, or you’re at a point in your career where you have to be “all in” at the moment. While these situations come with their own stress, they are important seasons to honor.
Give these seasons grace rather than regretting or shaming yourself for the things you don’t have time for at the moment. Remember the only constant in life is change- this will not be your schedule forever.
Finally, give yourself permission to stop comparing yourself to your others (or an ideal past or future self you have in mind). Truly honoring your season of life means radically accepting all things as they are right now. It means loving the place you are living (even if you are looking to move). It means loving your body as it is right now (even if you are working to improve it). It means accepting and forgiving yourself, faults and all (even as you work to heal past wounds).
Stop and appreciate everything you have right now, and respect that even during hard times, to everything in life there is a season.
With love,
Allison